10 cars sold in Europe that nobody gives a toss about

". ." (xllx) 08/16/2013 at 21:08 • Filed to: lists, oppositelock

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Every market has its share of mind-bogglingly boring and awful cars. Here's a list of 10 anti-petrolhead vehicles that are or were reasonably recently sold in Europe. Order is random and strictly of the "because I say so" variety.

1. Daewoo Espero

Oh, the Espero, one of Daewoo's first ventures into the European market. And what a disaster it was. Based on the very 80's Opel Ascona and armed with miserable 1.5 (90 hp), 1.8 (95 hp) and 2.0 (105 hp) engines (fun fact: the latter two are non-interference engines so you can go on a cambelt snapping extravaganza without causing any damage) it tried to compete against titans like the Ford Mondeo or the Opel Vectra, with predictable results. Equipment levels were decent (and a selling point), but dismal quality, uninspiring design and dated oily bits caused it to flop spectacularly everywhere except Eastern Europe.
Why is it on the list? Because it was supposed to be a warning shot and the beginning of an invasion, while after the smoke dispersed it turned out that the Koreans only shot themselves in the foot. Now that the vast majority of Esperos have been scrapped we should honor its memory by never speaking of it again.

2. Honda FR-V

"So you have a family. It's you, your loving spouse and four beautiful kids. Obviously, you're going to need a car to ferry all your young'uns around. But what to buy? A regular car doesn't have enough seats and a minivan is too big/depressing/blobby! Fret no more, because Honda is coming to the rescue with its 6 seater FR-V! Now all of your worries are over and you can be as happy as those families in cereal commercials!" - that was probably what people running Honda thought when they were releasing the FR-V. Unfortunately, reality proved to be somewhat different and the CR-V based minivan found few buyers. We have to admire the FR-V for managing to be a spectacular failure in a segment where it had only one competitor - the Fiat Multipla. Taking the design out of the equasion (the FR-V was ugly and sleep inducingly boring, and the Multipla was so goofy that Disney should sue for copyright infringement) Honda managed to lose on almost all fronts. Their car was much more expensive (the only sensible 2.2 diesel got additionally ganked by import taxes) and only had small and uncomfortable token middle seats. Buying one of those means that you aren't fun or brave enough to get the Fiat and you're willing to let your kids suffer for it.
Why is it on the list? Because it was so boring that even the novelty of owning a Multipla was better.

3. Toyota Yaris Verso

The Toyota Yaris Verso. It's just one of those cars that I don't have to write much about and you will still know and understand why it's here. It's probably the most boring car that could be bought within the last 10 years, and that's saying something. Let's forget about it forever.
Why is it on the list? Because even though it was called Toyota Fun Cargo in Japan there wasn't anything remotely fun about it.

4. Ford Fusion

The European Ford Fusion was a fifth generation Fiesta on a step ladder. It was quite possibly the most pointless car in recent history. While the Fiesta was a good and fun to drive if a little dull looking little hatchback, the Fusion managed to be even more boring without any of the redeeming features. It was less fun to drive, slower, heavier, uglier, more thirsty, and louder at speed, also - the ride was worse and you couldn't even get it with four wheel drive. It shared the Fiesta's rubbish dashboard too. I remember my parents getting one of those as a courtesy car once. My most vivid memories of it include the shocking ride and how upright everything was.
Why is it on the list? Because its selling point was that it's easy to get in for seniors. Yes, really.

5. Citroen Xsara

Ah, Citroen. So many exciting designs, great innovations and bold ideas. If there are two things you can count any citroen to be it's Comfortable and unusual. The Xsara wasn't any of those things, what it was is perhaps the most vanilla European compact car of the 90's. Even the 3 door version failed to inject any excitement into this heap.
Why is it on the list? Because the only thing it has in common with Citroens of yonder is the reliability. Or rather lack thereof.

6. Renault Latitude

You can own a Samsung phone, a Samsung microwave, a TV set, a dishwasher and many other things. So why not get a Samsung car too? Yup, the Latitude is nothing else but a rebadged Samsung SM5 and a limp-wristed attempt to bite off a slice of the European premium mid-size market. Exactly the place where it's going to be (and already is being) utterly trampled by its domestic rivals.
Why is it on the list? Because it's a boring Korean saloon without a fighting chance in the same segment as the Laguna.

7. Tata Indica

Remember how tragic Korean cars were when they first started coming to western markets? If you need a reminder just look at the Espero above. Well, somehow the Indians managed to be even worse. Yup, I thought it was impossible too. The Indica was one of the first Indian cars that were going to be offered all across Europe. They even secured a spot in the British market by striking a deal with Rover and rebadging this thing as CityRover. And? Nothing. Nothing happened, nobody wanted them. And it's hard not to see why. They were ugly, shoddily made and archaic little boxes with absolutely zero appeal. And !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! how they look after three years. Quality.
Why is it on the list? Look at the bloody thing. Why wouldn't it be?

8. Renault Thalia

Long story short - Renault had a decent small hatchback called Clio. They stuck a massive arse on it, changed the badge to Thalia and put it on sale without looking at it.. And what's even more horrifying than the appearance of this thing is the fact that it wasn't a bad seller at all. Funnily enough, you don't really see them anymore, even though they were sold until the late 00's when they were replaced by the Dacia Logan. Either they were declared weapons of mass destruction thanks to their ability to cause blindness and destroyed, or they simply fell apart. Either way let us never speak of it again.
Why is it on the list? Because if your car's only selling point is a massive boot then something went horribly wrong.

9. Nissan Primera P12

A Nissan Primera? A by-word for classic Japanese reliability? Here? On the same list as all those horrible cars? Are you off your face on acid you knobend? - I hear you shout at me while droplets of spit fly everywhere. Yes, I respond, and despite your rude demeanor I shall now give you the reasons for why I've decided to put it on here.
It seems that in this Nissan-Renault collaboration, the French forgot to give the Japanese any meaningful tasks beside slapping on some badges. This last of Primeras has been styled by a group of insane 4 year olds somewhere in Germany and features Renault technology with a large serving of typical French dependability. It managed what years of near nonexistent designs failed to do - bury the Primera badge and Nissan's reputation for reliability with it..
Why is it on the list? Because it's a horrid thing even Nissan wants to forget.

10. Volkswagen Golf Plus

When the Golf Plus arrived die-hard fans of hats all over Europe rejoiced. Finally, there was a car designed specifically for them. One that they could drive without having to first take off their beloved headgear! The unfortunate thing is that there was little market for the Plus outside of the hat fandom. The increased hatroom did little to boost practicality and the car, unlike the larger Touran, could only seat five. What's more, in the process of filling the regular Golf with more air Volkswagen spoiled the smooth ride and pleasant handling characteristics. The fact that it came out just as 2.0 TDI engines started exploding en masse didn't help it either. Nice job, VW! At least nobody can say that they don't care about niche markets.
Why is it on the list? Because unlike the equally pointless Ford C-Max the Plus sold in dismal numbers, and just like the Ford it deserves to be forgotten.

Now I need a stiff drink. Or 20.

Image credits:
Wikimedia
cars-directory.net
autogaleria.pl
katalog-samochodow.pl
autoevolution.com
xsarausuarios.es
automobilesreview.com
cargurus.com
autokult.pl

Nibby > . . 08/16/2013 at 21:21

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I drove an Indica once. TERRIBLE

dogisbadob > . . 08/16/2013 at 21:34

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I like almost all of those cars and wish they were sold over here. The Primera P12 is awesome, and I wish they had kept selling the Infiniti G20 (what the P10-11 were called in the US) because small 4-cylinderluxury cars are awesome.

The FRV and Yaris Verso are really cool-looking. Not to mention the Japanese engineering behind them.

I'm surprised the Thalia wasn't sold in the US under any badge, since that's really the only reason to graft a trunk on to a hatchback (the Chinese car market didn't exist back then).

The Latitude should've been the new Maxima, or even an Infiniti I-series.

The European Fusion looks cool, too. Had they brought it over here, then the Fusion name would be taken and they'd just have to import the Mondeo again, instead of a Mexican Mazda 6.

Milky > . . 08/16/2013 at 21:35

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The surfacing on this thing is horrid, look at that body side reflection.

Walter Rohrl's Left Foot says save the manuels > . . 08/16/2013 at 21:41

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why does it seem like you're Romanian?

also I drove a Thalia (clio sedan) for a week in Romania, and while not a great car, it was fun.

Gearbox and clutch were shit though

. . > Walter Rohrl's Left Foot says save the manuels 08/16/2013 at 21:42

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I don't know, why does it? I'm not Romanian.

. . > Nibby 08/16/2013 at 21:43

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Not just terrible but TERRIBLE?

. . > Milky 08/16/2013 at 21:43

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Everything about it is horrific. And that's the better looking, facelifted version...

Nibby > . . 08/16/2013 at 22:02

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TERRIBAD even

. . > Nibby 08/16/2013 at 22:03

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Blimey!

Anon > . . 08/16/2013 at 22:16

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TIL samsung made cars.

SpeedSix > . . 08/16/2013 at 22:24

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Well, there is one thing noteworthy about the Citroen Xsara:

It's rallying success continued on in the Citroen C4 WRC, as driven by Sébastien Loeb.

dsigned001 - O.R.C. hunter > . . 08/16/2013 at 23:37

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I'd rock that Honda. Just sayin'.

BiTurbo228 - Dr Frankenstein of Spitfires > . . 08/17/2013 at 04:49

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The Nissan Primera is one of those cars that is, without fail, driven incredibly poorly. I always back off slightly when there's one in front of me.

BATC42 > . . 08/17/2013 at 05:27

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Sure in standard trim the Xsara is not that great, but in VTS trim it's an awesome little car. It came with one of the best chassis of the late 90's/early 00's including a passive rear wheel steering system . You could have it wiht 4 engines, 2 diesels (90 and 110 hp) and 2 petrol (138 and 167 hp). Sure it's not the best looking car in the world, but it's a damn good one.

. . > BATC42 08/17/2013 at 05:35

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You're probably the first person I've heard (outside owners clubs) that likes the Xsara. It's the epitome of meh.

Mikeado > dogisbadob 08/17/2013 at 05:50

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OK, I know your tastes are different to much of Oppo's and obviously there's no issue with that at all, but... just no.

The Primera (P12) was worse than any and all of the class benchmarks. TG magazine joked that if you could sell yours to someone, you got £200 in fuel vouchers as a reward for your salesman skills. It didn't look as good as the old one and was worse on every comparison point than the Mondeo/Vectra/Passat one should've been considering at the time.

The Fusion is - and I'll take no argument on this at all - THE Worst car that Ford Europe has ever made. That interior is the most boring interior I have ever seen in my life. The outside was basically the rather plain '00s Fiesta stretched upwards and looks completely uninspiring both in pictures AND in person. It was bought EXCLUSIVELY by people with white hair who could no longer buy a Rover and the only reason it was on sale so long is because even Ford had managed to forget about that utterly dreary pension box with zero redeeming features of any kind. I haven't seen one on the roads here in a long time and I'm glad about that.

The Thalia strikes me as something you could buy in Mexico and take across the border. But Renault aren't in the American market and it doesn't look like a Nissan.

I quite liked the FRV, myself, although why make a car for six and then give it the bootspace of a big Civic? It should've been longer, and everyone who liked the 3+3 idea already had a Multipla.

The Yaris Verso is a Japanese Ford Fusion, but with lots of poorly-conceived curves on it.

The Latitude wouldn't have been put together as well as what you actually got.

BATC42 > . . 08/17/2013 at 05:59

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Well, I own one. But I agree with everything he says on how the car looks. It's not very pretty, the interior is not very nice, it's just a mid 90's french car in its design (look at the 206, same thing), the Xsara is a 306 wearing a (crappy) different outfit. But it is a great car once you take it on the right roads, give it a twisty road and you're in heaven, the ride is great, the handling is awesome.

I would rather had a 306 but when I was in the market for a car 306s were too expensive (around 4k € for a base model with 200k + km on the clock), and 2.0l HDI 306 were even more expensive (around 5k €).

So the Xsara is not great because of its looks but it's not terrible either.

duurtlang > . . 08/18/2013 at 18:25

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Good list. My part of Europe never got the Thalia, Indica or Latitude, but I get your point about them. I would've left the Xsara out myself. Not a good looking car, but it was decent in everything else. Unlike the rest of the cars in this list.

The Golf Plus and the Fusions weren't sales flops here (the Netherlands). They're quite popular with older people.

. . > duurtlang 08/18/2013 at 18:27

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The Fusion wasn't a sales flop here either. That doesn't make it any better though.

Autolegend86 > . . 08/18/2013 at 18:43

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Not all Xsara's were created equal.

. . > Autolegend86 08/18/2013 at 18:44

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I'd like to know what % of parts is shared with the production model. ;)

Autolegend86 > SpeedSix 08/18/2013 at 18:47

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More than one thing actually. The Xsara awesomeness came in 2 flavors.

The front wheel drive giant killer.

and the 4wd assault.

Autolegend86 > . . 08/18/2013 at 18:54

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Kit Car regs still required the use of the factory unibody shell but onto that could be bolted a wide assortment of special fenders and panels. On the power-train front, as long as it was N/A 2.0L, anything went.

PanchoVilleneuve ST > dsigned001 - O.R.C. hunter 08/19/2013 at 23:35

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That shifter is very enticing to me for some reason. It's like the one you used to get in a Volvo S60 without any of the style.

Tim Tom > . . 08/20/2013 at 03:54

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Nobody gives a toss about many cars that 10 years ago were a dream for many. Mixing cars that are long gone with those still in production is not to my taste, because then you should take into account how the cars were perceived in their time. Daewoo Espero is a horrible car, but it was the nr1 car in the late 90s in every country to the east from Austria. It had power-everything - steering, windows, locks, power antenna, AC.. and it was 30% cheaper than Passat or Vectra or similar. So the car was a big success Daewoo, even though it was based on a car from the 80s and was as safe as a pile of rocks falling from the skies.

Ford Fusion - wobbly box on top of Ford Fiesta, yet a sale success in many countries.

Golf Plus - 30% of all Golfs sold in Europe since mk5 when they started with the Plus were sold in this constapated-about-to-explode-looks-like-an-egg version.

So, your list is good, just the headline is kinda wrong.

Fuel_of_Satan > BATC42 08/20/2013 at 04:06

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Agreed. The Xsara has no place on this list, it isn't unreliable nor bad looking. Just boring. Some might even say it looks good. Build quality and reliability was nothing out of the ordinary. Its just a bad car in the same way as a Camry is, by being boring.

Taking the current price difference out of the equation I would probably have gone for a Peugeot 406 if a French coupe of this vintage was my priority. I would probably shoot for Peugeot's Pininfarina lines even in 4-door guise come to think of it.

I might be biased though, I've already owned 4 Pininfarina penned Pug's and I'm likely to repeat it.

Fuel_of_Satan > BiTurbo228 - Dr Frankenstein of Spitfires 08/20/2013 at 04:15

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I use that rule for all cars that are exclusively bought by people who don't care about cars. Meaning Korean and Japanese compacts, particularly 10-15 year old ones in pristine condition. Yaris Verso and Daewoo Espero are great examples of what I mean. Maybe also the Renault Thalia, but I haven't actually seen enough of them to make a judgment. I would certainly keep my distance just to be safe.

Without a single fender bender in 12 years of driving so far, I'd say its working.

Ce he sin > . . 08/20/2013 at 04:21

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I don't think the Primera had anything to do with Renault.

Fl1ngstam > . . 08/20/2013 at 05:26

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Nicely written.

Just a couple of points I'd like to make.

The Ford Fusion was originally targeted as a hip vehicle for young people. Millenials, if you will. However, Ford failed to realise that by creating a bland upright vehicle the only people who would be interested would be the elderly. The opposite of what they were planning.

Also, there is ZERO Renault technology in the P12 Primera. None. Nada. The car was already designed before the Renault-Nissan Alliance was formed. Some lazy dumb auto journalists working for a fact-free magazine may have pontificated that it would be a Laguna with Nissan badges, but they were wrong. And Lazy. And dumb. This information doesn't make the P12 Primera a better car, just not a French-influenced one.

Apollon > . . 08/20/2013 at 06:02

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Fun facts:

1. The Espero resembles the down-sized bastard child of a Citroën XM (rear) and Xantia (front). Just look at them, side-to-side, for a time, and you'll find not only a few similarities.

3. The Yaris Verso is great for people with disabilities. Big rear door that opens sideways, upright seat position, lots of space - imagine this as the car of a person in a wheelchair and it all makes sense.

4. Ford Fusion: A miracle for elderly people. Rather expensive and boring used car. As no yound and/or speed-interested folks buy this car, you always see them in silver ( beige ) in good condition. This car tends to be the most reliable and safe vehicle by the standards of the German TÜV, our MOT I guess.

5. Xsara: a smaller Xantia without the hydropneumatic system. Yuck.

6. Reanult Latitude: You can't buy this car. Seriously, it's not possible, as it is exclusively for leasing.

9. The Primera won the red dot design award in 2002. The design and its all-round visibility is so well-planned that the car has a rear-view camera as standard equipment.

10. The Golf Plus is a car bought by old people. They like the idea of the Golf but want to sit more elevated and upright. Getting in and out is easier for them in a slightly higher car. Beware if you're driving behind one, you never know what the next move might be...

Apollon > duurtlang 08/20/2013 at 06:20

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The biggest problem is its heritage: the Xsara lacked everything that made a Citroën great. Just think of the mid-size Xantia with its bonkers central hydraulics system (brakes, servo-assisted steering and the suspension actuated by a single oil cycle!) And even the Xantia was considered the most boring Citroën at that time because the dashboard looked like one of a regular car .

Now remove every characteristic token of this vehicle. Make it smaller, make it rounder, keep the old engines without modification. You now have a Xsara.

In its defense, the Xantia and the Xsara were of superior build quality, at least for a Citroën proportions - keep in mind that the miserable electric failure waiting to happen every week (known as the otherwise adorable XM) was released only a few years prior to them. The cars theirselves aren't that bad. Most owners bought them cheap and deferred on maintenance, so the cars went down quickly. If you accept the fact that these cars need regular maintenance and some love, you're fine.

. . > Fl1ngstam 08/20/2013 at 06:33

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Well for starters, all the diesels in the Primera were sourced from Renault. Including the woefully unreliable 1.9 dCi.

. . > Fuel_of_Satan 08/20/2013 at 06:38

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The Xsara was boring and not as well made as most rivals. They often suffer from many small, but annoying niggles and interiors are prone to falling apart. It was successful as a rally car, but as a road car should be forgotten.

. . > Tim Tom 08/20/2013 at 06:54

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Regarding the Espero, I mentioned that it took off in Eastern Europe. However, the fact that it did doesn't mean it's a good car. Now that almost all have been scrapped it deserves to be forgotten. There was literally zero appeal to it and the only reason anyone would buy one was because of the low price (which was reflected in low quality).

The Fusion was a sales success too, that doesn't mean it's worth remembering though. It's bland, pointless and exclusively driven by people who may not even know what brand their car is.

duurtlang > Apollon 08/20/2013 at 07:17

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I know, I daily drive a Peugeot 406 (coupe) that shares quite a lot with the Xantia.

However, when it comes to boring/regular I'd argue the ZX is worse than its replacement the Xsara.

A-J-I > . . 08/20/2013 at 07:21

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Came in here expecting to disagree with most of your choices (I quite like the sort of daft and quirky cars that normally end up on these lists) but actually found myself nodding at basically all of them.

. . > A-J-I 08/20/2013 at 07:35

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If it's quirky it has no place on this list because that makes it interesting by default.

J-Tenno > duurtlang 08/20/2013 at 07:45

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My brother has had the courtesy of riding a Tata Indica. He says it was the scariest car ride of his life, it didn't accelerate at all, it drove at 65-70 km/h in a highway and it was small, crammed and noisy inside.

He did not enjoy it at all.

Fl1ngstam > . . 08/20/2013 at 08:08

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When you say "all the diesels", you mean one of them, right?

The 1.9DCi was a Renault unit (F9Q), fitted only to LHD market vehicles. That would explain why I've never seen one. The 2.2DCi was a Nissan Diesel (YD22).

In any case, I must apologise. Nissan asked Renault to supply one of the 4 engines fitted to the car. And a DCi badge. So, if you buy a P12 Primera Diesel, there is a chance that you will find some Renault technology in there. Still, I stand by the fact that the P12 was designed before Nissan and Renault formed an Alliance, so it's a Japanese car with an exterior design proposed by a Swiss man working in Germany. Renault did not tell Nissan to do anything on it.

. . > Fl1ngstam 08/20/2013 at 08:12

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I thought the 2.2 dCi engine fitted to the primera was a Renault unit too (one of the G-series), but I was wrong about that. Still, since the P12 was released in 2001/2002 and the alliance was formed in 1999, it's hard to imagine that Renault wouldn't want to participate in a project that was pretty big for the European market. Much of the equipment (like door locks) has Renaults stamps on it and many bits and bobs are shared with Meganes and Lagunas. I also keep hearing about the car's "French electronics" but can't find a credible source for that claim.

Even if it's not a 100% Renault, it's still decidedly more French than a Primera should be.

Fl1ngstam > . . 08/20/2013 at 08:14

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You see, we're both wrong in our own special ways. That's why we're on the internet and not in some top-secret laboratory developing a cure for cancer.

Keep up the good work!

. . > Fl1ngstam 08/20/2013 at 08:23

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Amen to that. :]

Fl1ngstam > . . 08/20/2013 at 08:29

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Good points. The fundamentals of the design were laid out prior to the Alliance. What happened between the Alliance being founded and Start of Production was the Nissan engineers being pushed to adopt as many Renault minor common parts as possible, to increase combined parts volume and thus save money. However, there were no major systems or structures carried over from Renault vehicles. Electronics are all Nissan, for example.

Turbineguy: Nom de Zoom > . . 08/20/2013 at 09:31

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Looks like the Golf Plus shares the roofline with the Prius. A dubious distinction, at best. Also, is it just me or does that Renault Latitude look an awful lot like the last-gen Passat? Fusion and Thalia share the prize for ugliest steering wheel.

Mike_Smith > . . 08/21/2013 at 01:31

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"Samsung SM5"? Samsung makes cars?! [Googles] Well, paint my ass purple and call me Charlie. Doesn't look like they're doing very well though...

mickey_g > . . 08/21/2013 at 05:12

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I ran a Nissan franchise when that Primera was on sale. They were good value when new compared to rivals but the people that bought them generally did so as they had good experiences of Nissan reliability. Then Nissan decided to take the most unreliable bits of Renaults and put them into their cars. It was the modern equivalent of a fleet of Alfa Arnas; I had one Primera demonstrator shit itself after 400 miles. The cars with the Renault DCi engines buried Nissan's reputation for good with me.

Pockets > Fuel_of_Satan 08/21/2013 at 07:55

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It has a place on this list in that "nobody gives a toss about it"; its not a bad car, its just an "oh yeah, that" car.

It's okay to drive (nice handling, spongy brakes), the smaller petrol engines suck, the interior is boring and shoddy but fairly practical and the exterior styling is just dull on the original ones and ugly on the facelift.

There's no real reason to buy one when the 306 does almost everything the same or better, which is why its a perfect fit on a list of cars that make people go "meh".

Fuel_of_Satan > Pockets 08/21/2013 at 13:05

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There are plenty of more "meh-worthy" cars than this. It at least has some rally pedigree which provides some bragging rights at the water cooler.

"Yeah, that's right. Me and Loeb. We're like that, mate."

PS: The 3-door hatch as pictured was classified as coupe. The 306 was a hatchback. Not the same type of vehicle.

M.L. Lapid > . . 08/22/2013 at 01:53

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-> I would think these cars would pass for US/North America consumption:

1. Toyota Yaris Verso - The Verso could chomp off the class before the Transit Connect arrived.

2. Honda FR-V - The FR-V is the ultimate PT Cruiser killer! Just offer it with the CR-V's K24.

3. VW Golf Plus - The Golf Plus would make the arrival of the Tiguan pointless, and the PT/HHR tremble! Just offer the same engines as the regular Golf does!

^ In America, boring sells!!! Just look at the Camry, Corolla, & Cruze!